IrenicEmbers

We went one sunny rare Saturday to Anacortes….and the dog didn’t eat anyone. I call that a success.

I wish that I wasn’t talking on the phone to Sprint customer service, driving down I5 South, on my way home… that I could have pulled out my camera and take a picture of two sets of birds…ducks maybe flying in perfect V formation over the highway. For some reason it was surreal. Haven’t seen that in ages. Haven’t looked up at the sky in ages either.

So, it’s a little known fact that when I first met Nick … I tried to set him up with my friend Maggie. Not because of any reason in particular, as a matter of fact, Maggie was in a relationship at the time I believe.

I figured he’s white and she’s white … and therefore it was a perfect match. Nick and Maggie has since never quite gotten along. She thinks he’s the devil and he just loves nothing more than to torture her.

So last night, Nick and I sat down to watch Lost World: Land of the Giants; and I have to say, I’m conflicted. It was a nice somewhat cinematic overview of Guyana, the rainforest and some species that thrive there. My conflict with it is that I always bristle a bit whenever people go into that country and offer “insight” into the natural resources because I’m wary that others will exploit the land and the people.

I need to go further into this but for now I have a ton of things that I have to do for June and for work…. and still make dinner.

The past few days have been filled with good things and really bad feelings … and I don’t know where to start. I feel like I have to start censoring myself … again.

The long and short of it is that I did something really good for my cousins (bought them a new computer). Something that will make all 4 of them be really happy and able to do their schoolwork and be smart and successful and go on to be Presidents of this land and others.

The bad thing is that for some inane reason, I am picking fights with Nick and it’s transferring itself into my subconscious where I’m having dreams about us fighting. It’s because of his messed up family. But more on that later.

The other bad thing is work. I came thisclose to leaving that misery, got scammed back and now regret it again. And the other other bad thing about work is that one of my most liked co-worker is going through a rough time and I feel so helpless because if there’s one shit I hate … is when bad things happen to people that are good to their cores.